The Suit

Before I left my former company, Ate Kae gave me a parting gift: her beautiful two-piece beige suit. Tucked inside was a note—simple, but deeply meaningful. She told me to wear it when I achieve my dreams.

She shared that she had once reserved it for a special occasion of her own, but chose to pass it on instead. Perhaps she saw how determined I was to keep growing, to keep going. Or maybe she believed I could give that suit the stage it had long been waiting for.

Over time, I’ve worn the pieces separately, on a few occasions. But never together—until recently. Somehow, it never felt like the right moment. Like Ate Kae, I, too, wanted to save it for something significant: a milestone, a ceremony, a recognition that quietly says, "you’ve made it."

But life doesn’t always unfold in clear milestones. More often, I’ve found myself in between—closing chapters, stepping into new ones, constantly in motion.

These days though, I find myself dressed less in structured pieces and more in movement—sportswear, dancewear, heck even swimwear—answering the sound of the music or the call of the sea, testing not just my strength, but my ability to stay in flow in every sense of the word.

Because the truth is, many of us—especially women—are holding multiple roles all at once. Daughter. Lifelong learner. Caregiver. Entrepreneur. Leader. Each role drops into our lives like coins into a piggy bank, quietly shaping how we measure our worth.

Then there’s the other side of the coin: friend, woman, lover, partner, wife, mother, matriarch. Identities we carry, nurture, and sometimes struggle to balance.

And just when we begin to find our footing, life intervenes. People come and go. Health shifts. Hearts break. Systems change. Crises unfold. Loss arrives unannounced. Even death reminds us—nothing is guaranteed.

Life is fleeting. The roles we hold so tightly today may one day fall away just as quickly as they came.

So I wonder: will there come a time when I no longer wear a suit like this? When it no longer fits—not just my body, but the life I’ve chosen? After all, our bodies change. Our paths evolve. What once symbolized arrival may later feel like something we’ve outgrown.

And maybe that’s the point.

Fulfillment isn’t always found in waiting for the “right” moment. Sometimes, it lives in choosing—again and again—the paths that resonate most deeply with who we are now, and having the courage and commitment to see them through.

Whatever future we shape, may it bring us happiness, peace, and purpose. May it leave the world gentler than we found it.

So wear the suit. Re-imagine how it should look. Or begin again.

But whatever you do—let yourself shine.

Challenge the status quo. Break the barriers placed before you.

Bet on yourself.

Our nature as women—both tender and powerful—is not something to diminish or give away. It is ours to claim, to honor, and to carry forward.

And that, in itself, is more than enough.

#March #InternationalWomenMonth #EndofSTA #LessonstoLive

Commentary (not a review) of GOMBURZA: Catching fire & getting caught in its flames

Not many Filipino films hauntingly capture how a cause takes root, draw people in & make them hopeful, only to find out its true cost at the end.

In fact, mere association can get you into deep trouble. From mentor to student, brother to brother, bystander to fighter, the fires of one’s principles & beliefs can easily spread and take hold of one’s actions. The film showed how a nation’s identity is formed, sometimes incidentally, only to be later inflamed by brutality. History books simply wrote 3 priests faced execution after false accusations. But its portrayal on screen was so emotional, it had me crying even after the credits rolled. Fr. Gomez, at the edge of his life, could only entrust his fate to God. Fr. Zamora was too deep in his depression for just being at the wrong place at the wrong time. Fr. Burgos, once passionate fighting for his & other people’s rights amidst prejudice, was unnerved with disbelief that justice has been denied from them for so little evidence.

Perhaps we can also relate more to the ones who escaped such dire fate. Caught on advocacies without truly knowing its weight, we eventually cave in to cowardice when the going gets tough due to pressure, lack of money, maybe false hopes and promises. After the film, I felt like I owe an apology for not being able to hold the line for those who taught us to be good and true. I would like to make it up this year with a bit more purposeful and worthwhile activities, God willing.

Fun fact: I sent audition videos a little late for small parts but if you noticed, it was a male dominated film & the closest female role I can recall is that of the nun running to Fr. Gomez screaming in panic that the police was here to arrest him ahahaha. Would still have taken that role just because it’s a JesCom production.

Side Note: Theater thespian Cedrick Juan is haunting my dreams.

Yellow

“But if you tame me, it will be as if the sun came to shine on my life. I shall know the sound of a step that will be different from all the others. Other steps send me hurrying back underneath the ground. Yours will call me, like music, out of my burrow. And then look: you see the grain-fields down yonder? I do not eat bread. Wheat is of no use to me. The wheat fields have nothing to say to me. And that is sad. But you have hair that is the color of gold. Think how wonderful that will be when you have tamed me! The grain, which is also golden, will bring me back the thought of you. And I shall love to listen to the wind in the wheat . . ."  

    ~ The Fox, The Little Prince: https://www.angelfire.com/.../littlep.../framechapter21.html

***

When you first arrived, I thought I was only going to show you around the city & stick to the business on hand. It turned out we’ll also be crossing cities in search of great sights, sounds, food & drinks. Thank you for your willingness & enthusiasm to get dragged to places we wanna go, squeeze into the small spaces of jeeps & tricycles, be patient to know what modeling is like, & try out any food we give you. The slightly guarded, sometimes crazy, often private self was suddenly sharing a little more than I usually do (your good taste in wine probably helped & tables turned on me when you asked the questions). Our height & now distance may be great but our hearts seem just right next to each other because we risked “taming” one another. And for that, the fox’s parting words rang true: "It is only with the heart that one can see rightly; what is essential is invisible to the eye."

Enough of the tears now, because this is not goodbye but simply see you later! Enjoy your journey across the globe & let’s cherish this ride of our lives!

Unending Grace

I remember panicking a bit in my high school English class when all my classmates have already gotten back their scored essay and I wasn’t called yet to retrieve my paper. I checked my bag to see if I tucked away the essay we were supposed to submit the other day. Instead, I pulled out my draft and read the first words I wrote – only to realize you were reading them aloud in class. It earned the top marks for that writing exercise and you thought it worthy to read it out to everyone. After reading it and calling my name to everyone’s surprise, I humbly came forward to receive my paper as the class applauded – I guess from then onwards, I earned the reputation for being a good writer and poet. This led to joining writing competitions and having side hustles that came useful throughout the years.

You see, more than encouraging us to read deeply into our books and sharpening our grammars and compositions, you gave me one thing I needed the most at that time – to believe in myself, especially that I could apparently do something so well. It took me out of the books I comforted myself with at a time a teen had to deal with the loneliness of having to adjust to another school and environment. Your notes of encouragement in our writing exercises coaxed out the words I had always wanted to say yet never had the chance to do so – until I had the confidence to write them down, your faith that I could do it, and the opportunity to represent others and their sentiments.

There were other fond memories as well that could attest to your kindness despite being the Prefect of Discipline. I came in late for school once (despite living just across the street, haha). Thus, I had to hang around your office (as every Isabelina who came in late or had the guts to flaunt too long ribbons and too long skirts). Luckily, I was not perennially late and I did not have to run around the campus as a sanction. I was back in class just after a few minutes chatting with you. Even when I was already in college and I was applying for a conference, I went back to my alma mater to ask if you could write an endorsement for me. Not only did you obliged my request – we also talked about love and how you never minded being single for so long yourself (“Kung wala, eh di wala!”). But then God had other plans and your husband ‘Ta Orbitz (who was my College Algebra Teacher and equally passionate in teaching like you) came along. These words of comfort and wisdom written on paper and etched in memories are still with me and to the rest of us who became your students.

In the same way that you have shared with us the gift of your presence, we pray and hope that these recollections shall also bring comfort to those who are very dear to you at this moment. I hope these words somehow gave a fitting tribute to your life as a grace that has blessed mine. Thank you so much Ma’am Linda! Dios Mabalos po!

a glowing endorsement

An Angel Among Us

A Eulogy for Fr. Angelo "Boboy" Silerio, SJ (24 March 1973 - 30 April 2019) during the Necrological Services on Saturday 4 May 2019 at the Christ the King Church, AdNU

It is an honor to be asked to speak about Fr. Boboy. Allow me to reminisce more than a year that I have known him, working side by side with him at the Human Resource Management Office (HRMO) as a colleague before he was appointed as OIC Principal of the Junior High School and as a friend.

2015 – Fr. Boboy was assigned for a brief period to Ateneo de Naga University before being stationed somewhere else for a longer period. Being in the HRMO then tasked with the Orientation Seminar (ORSEM) for new employees, I told him, “Sayang Fr., madali lang stay ninyo dito” to which he replied with a serious and timid smile, “Ay oo nga, sayang.” Lo and behold, a few years later, he was reassigned back to Ateneo this time as the Leadership Development and Succession Program or LDSP Officer at our office then later as SHS Campus Minister as well. That is how I got to work closely with him, assisting him in his training sessions while working in the same office along with eleven more colleagues.

Like most Jesuits I know, I have heard or seen his own peculiar characteristics. He like to fish. He likes to plant and do all sorts of thing related to farming. He looks younger than his age but has ailments that are that of an old man’s. Strangely enough, his ailments became one of the things that led me to know him better because I got so sick just before he moved in our office. When I came back from my sick leave, he gave me this improvised crystal stress ball. It struck me how resourceful he can be, and how he thoughtful he was to try and help me in his signature “little” ways.

If time and health had not been a challenge, I can hardly think of a time he said “no” to people who asked for his help. “We do what we can!” sabi niya nga. If he was in no capacity to aid them, he would consult others or ask favors from friends on behalf of friends. When it comes to counseling, he would try to grasp the situations his counselees would face. For example: there was this time when we were busy preparing for his training and he asked me about my opinion on a certain situation. He asked me, “Ms. Trish, kung idto nangyari saimo, anong magiging reaction mo?” To which I candidly replied, “Well, depende po, Fr. Kasi po para sa mga lalake, dae man po yan big deal. Pero siguro para sa kadaklan na babae, big deal po idto!” “Oh, talaga?” he answered back surprised while scratching his bald head. Indeed we had a good laugh at such dilemmas. But he truly takes into account people’s concerns, whether they are mundane or complex, to be able to help. His simple yet genuine concern endears him to others everywhere he goes.

One might be fooled into thinking that his calmness stems from naivety on things that are happening around him. Actually, he knows, he knows them too well. Magaling din siya sa pakiramdaman. In fact, he listens to all sides of the story yet he does not immediately casts the stone towards the erring side. I remember him saying that indeed, words, when spoken harshly or haphazardly, can never be taken back. When he airs his sentiments or when he does reprimand, he speaks with such firmness you can’t help but be embarrassed.

He was not without a few funny words of course. He was also a jester, occasionally filling in punch lines to jokes Kuya Lej may be more comfortable telling. He likes to sing! He is also great with the kids. Waiting patiently for them to kiss the Baby Jesus without fear. Carrying them until they stop crying. Listening patiently to their baby talk. Bringing them sweet treats. Coming up with baby names with significant meanings.

Apart from words, he is also mindful of caring for the environment. He would not want to put anything to waste. He would recycle cups that would serve as pots for his seedlings. He does not mind the inconvenience as long as the practice was ecologically sustainable.

We had one of our lengthy conversations right before March ended. He learned that I was leaving and chanced upon me when I was duty in Pacol. So I told him of my reasons, the personal circumstances I faced and how I came to my decisions. And of course, he also asked about me and my fellow colleague’s love lives, ala-Boy Abunda style: He mentions a name (on the top of his head, as he would describe it), and I would only air my take on them. Some of you may probably be victims of his match making. Even when he was recuperating at the Jesuit Infirmary, he was on the lookout for “referrals”. Thank you, Fr., for continually praying for our future partners. May they be as kind and loving as you are. In turn, we will also pray for more people to respond to the priestly vocation.

Speaking of marriage and other sacraments, he was also often invited to preside in funerals. Whenever we mention about superstitions when we attend services like this, he would disregard them, saying that when his time is up, it is up. Sa Diyoys tayo manalig! I remember thinking how kind and holy this man was and what he was saying was not far off. But Fr, I did not realize how soon this moment would come.

But I also realized that indeed your life was a testament of God’s love for people from all walks of life and for his creation. I still remember him recounting the many instances people told him that they love him (romantically). So I jokingly said, “Ikaw na Fr, ikaw na ang maraming nagmamahal!” But I also told him that that is no surprise. As Fr. James Martin, S.J. wrote in his book, “The more loving you are..the more likely it is that others will fall in love with you.”

Let’s not lose this moment to tell our loved ones how much we love them. Let’s not lose hope and faith in people and in the work that Fr. Boboy has sown, because his true legacy shall only grow when we are able to love others selflessly as he did.

In our fb conversation just last Sunday April 26, I shared with him this song that kept on playing in my head that day: Huwag kang Mangaba by the Himig Heswita. His reply was this: salamat sa prayers! magandang kanta nga yan para sa mga dadaanan ng transitions sa buhay.

How I wish in the next chapters of our lives you would still be there to accompany us. Your days were numbered but it was multiplied by the people you have so ardently served. We lost a dear friend, close confidant, and an ally in the pursuit of God’s mission. Farewell our match-maker, our favourite Indian, a travel companion, our to-go-to priest and most of all, our beloved friend. I bet the Lord will greet you at the gates of heaven with these words: “Well done, my good and faithful servant and friend!”

Photos by Trish Arana, Myllan Toledana & Jerico Lejano